So… twenty, huh. For those of you who don’t know (which is basically all of you), as of 2:03AM of May 3 yesterday, I am officially 20 years old. And boy, isn’t that a terrifying thought?
My last few days of being 19 years old were a mess. Every single thing that could go wrong did, from transportation, to banking, to family, to my own distastefully human body. Everything was simply one frustration after another and another. Honestly, I’m still reeling at how bad it all was, and I took it out on people I cared about, too. It was a trainwreck of a learning experience, but hey, I learned. Guess that’s what the last moments of being a teenager are for, if any. Now I just need to make it up to the people I’ve hurt.
In any case though, I’m 20 now. Boy, what does this mean for my life? I guess I have to start looking at my future more realistically. Finish a novel – or, if I’m lucky, get an internship in publishing. That would be more than I could dream. Danny was right, I should have wished on the birthday candles for that job, ahaha.
So, I have New Years Resolutions and I have my Monthly Updates, but what about a Birthday Resolution? 20 is a milestone, after all, especially since 21 and alcohol isn’t really anything special to me (drinking age is 18 in Korea). Well, as always, to hold myself accountable, I post the following goals:
- Become someone my friends can trust unconditionally and someone who will not mishandle that trust. As an adult in most senses of the word, become someone they can depend on to be mature and rational. Become a source of comfort and security, and once you are, don’t grow complacent.
- Finish five short stories or a novel, it really shouldn’t be that hard.
- Learn to live without being affected by what others (especially family) thinks of you. You’re strong, you’re independent, you’re healthy, and you know what you want. If your parents can’t be satisfied or happy for you, be doubly so with yourself.
Ah, I probably should schedule an email / letter for myself at age 21 or 25 to see how things change. Maybe I’ll go do that right now.